1
00:00:00,920 --> 00:00:07,789
Please don't grant me any more wishes,
Jeannie. It'll only make Dr. Bellows

2
00:00:07,790 --> 00:00:12,729
think I'm crazy. No, it won't, Master.
Not if you are dressed like Socrates,

3
00:00:12,730 --> 00:00:14,570
wisest man of all time.

4
00:00:18,490 --> 00:00:19,950
What a dumbass.

5
00:00:20,190 --> 00:00:21,240
Yes.

6
00:00:21,830 --> 00:00:23,450
Major Nelson, are you nuts?

7
00:00:24,170 --> 00:00:25,970
Quick, Jeannie, back in your bottle.

8
00:00:26,070 --> 00:00:27,120
Yes, Master.

9
00:00:29,610 --> 00:00:30,660
Major Nelson.

10
00:00:31,580 --> 00:00:36,060
This shell's gonna suck now. She's stuck
in the bottle. Yeah, that's the truck.

11
00:00:36,260 --> 00:00:37,360
It happened to me once.

12
00:00:38,680 --> 00:00:40,280
You're a dumbass, Beavis.

13
00:00:41,420 --> 00:00:42,470
Oh, yeah.

14
00:00:45,060 --> 00:00:46,110
Swap.

15
00:00:48,100 --> 00:00:49,720
Can't get a house while I'm gone.

16
00:00:49,980 --> 00:00:51,030
Clean up your room.

17
00:00:51,180 --> 00:00:52,280
Take out the garbage.

18
00:00:52,730 --> 00:00:53,780
Oh, check it out.

19
00:00:53,950 --> 00:00:56,540
I can't believe he's talking to Snoop
that way. Yeah.

20
00:00:56,810 --> 00:01:00,470
If that wasn't his mom, he'd be putting
the smack down. Yeah, really.

21
00:01:01,350 --> 00:01:02,490
Those are cool pajamas.

22
00:01:02,830 --> 00:01:03,880
Yeah.

23
00:01:05,290 --> 00:01:06,340
Snoop rules.

24
00:01:06,630 --> 00:01:07,680
Yeah, yeah.

25
00:01:08,110 --> 00:01:09,910
Doggy Dog is in the mother tail.

26
00:01:09,911 --> 00:01:14,069
Oh, check it out. He's got a phone on
the toilet.

27
00:01:14,070 --> 00:01:15,120
Yeah.

28
00:01:15,530 --> 00:01:16,910
We've got to get one of those.

29
00:01:19,990 --> 00:01:21,040
Dog.

30
00:01:22,400 --> 00:01:23,960
It's a doggy dog world.

31
00:01:25,040 --> 00:01:26,800
It's a doggy dog world.

32
00:01:27,400 --> 00:01:28,450
Yeah.

33
00:01:28,920 --> 00:01:29,980
It's your world.

34
00:01:33,280 --> 00:01:36,440
Well, let me just touch your boob. Of
course he did.

35
00:01:36,940 --> 00:01:38,540
It's a doggy dog world.

36
00:01:49,060 --> 00:01:50,120
I'm a G.

37
00:01:51,940 --> 00:01:55,140
I'm a straight G. Yeah, you're a G for
gonad.

38
00:01:55,420 --> 00:01:56,470
Shut up, what?

39
00:01:57,680 --> 00:01:59,480
You might get smoked if you keep at it.

40
00:01:59,620 --> 00:02:01,180
Hey, watch your back, homie.

41
00:02:05,020 --> 00:02:07,520
Hey, bud, you know I'm from Compton?

42
00:02:08,560 --> 00:02:10,300
Damn it, Beavis, shut up.

43
00:02:11,640 --> 00:02:13,000
You're not from Compton.

44
00:02:13,220 --> 00:02:14,420
No way, bud, I'm serious.

45
00:02:14,500 --> 00:02:16,220
I was kicking it on the street.

46
00:02:16,780 --> 00:02:17,830
It was a hard time.

47
00:02:18,900 --> 00:02:20,580
I used to drink gin and juice.

48
00:02:20,800 --> 00:02:25,659
It was cool. Beavis, you're a white
wussy from right here. No way, bud, you

49
00:02:25,660 --> 00:02:28,399
don't know. You weren't around then. You
know, me and Snoop, we used to go to

50
00:02:28,400 --> 00:02:29,739
the Compton Swap Meet together.

51
00:02:29,740 --> 00:02:30,790
Beavis.

52
00:02:31,100 --> 00:02:34,060
You used to go to the flea market with
your mom.

53
00:02:34,320 --> 00:02:36,490
Don't worry about it. See, I wear this
shirt.

54
00:02:36,680 --> 00:02:37,730
These are my colors.

55
00:02:38,060 --> 00:02:39,110
Beavis. Yep.

56
00:02:39,220 --> 00:02:41,000
I'm a straight G. Shut up.

57
00:02:42,500 --> 00:02:43,680
Yep. Me.

58
00:02:43,900 --> 00:02:46,730
I used to go to the Compton Swap Meet
with Snoop, you know.

59
00:02:46,880 --> 00:02:48,460
I used to kick it with Greg.

60
00:02:49,180 --> 00:02:50,280
Beavis. Shut up.

61
00:02:50,281 --> 00:02:54,659
You've never been to Compton. You're
never going to go to Compton. You're

62
00:02:54,660 --> 00:02:56,979
to be here for the rest of your life.
You're stupid.

63
00:02:56,980 --> 00:02:59,630
You don't have any money. You're never
going to score.

64
00:03:01,480 --> 00:03:08,459
What is

65
00:03:08,460 --> 00:03:09,510
it? Food?

66
00:03:10,800 --> 00:03:11,850
Let's roll.

67
00:03:13,100 --> 00:03:14,660
Uh, money?

68
00:03:18,640 --> 00:03:19,690
Cool.

69
00:03:22,000 --> 00:03:23,620
Maybe it's like that genie chick.

70
00:03:24,520 --> 00:03:28,380
Maybe it's like, give me wishes and call
me master and stuff.

71
00:03:30,300 --> 00:03:31,800
Who cut the cheese?

72
00:03:33,260 --> 00:03:35,080
I wish I knew who farted.

73
00:03:37,760 --> 00:03:38,810
Wait a minute.

74
00:03:38,811 --> 00:03:41,299
This bottle just gave me my wish,
butthead.

75
00:03:41,300 --> 00:03:42,520
I know who cut the cheese.

76
00:03:42,820 --> 00:03:44,080
It must have been one of us.

77
00:03:44,320 --> 00:03:46,880
And it wasn't me, so it must have been
you. Yeah.

78
00:03:47,880 --> 00:03:49,320
No way, butt knocker.

79
00:03:51,679 --> 00:03:54,029
Besides, there isn't any chick in that
bottle.

80
00:03:54,400 --> 00:03:56,510
There's nothing but a dead mouth in
there.

81
00:03:57,940 --> 00:03:58,990
You dumbass.

82
00:03:59,380 --> 00:04:01,880
It must have, like, farted before it
died.

83
00:04:02,800 --> 00:04:03,940
Don't wait, butt -head.

84
00:04:04,400 --> 00:04:05,960
And don't call me butt -knocker.

85
00:04:06,640 --> 00:04:08,020
Give me my genie bottle back.

86
00:04:08,680 --> 00:04:12,120
If that's a real genie bottle, let's see
it give you another wish.

87
00:04:13,160 --> 00:04:15,400
I gotta think of something to wish for.

88
00:04:17,279 --> 00:04:18,329
Let's see.

89
00:04:24,239 --> 00:04:25,289
Wait a minute.

90
00:04:27,380 --> 00:04:28,460
Wishing sucks.

91
00:04:30,600 --> 00:04:34,240
I wish for something cool or something.

92
00:04:36,900 --> 00:04:37,950
Uh,

93
00:04:39,640 --> 00:04:43,940
nothing cool happened, Beavis. Yeah,
that's pretty cool.

94
00:04:44,480 --> 00:04:46,260
No, it's not, buttwad.

95
00:04:46,480 --> 00:04:47,530
Oh, yeah.

96
00:04:50,700 --> 00:04:52,990
You better get rid of that damn bottled
fever.

97
00:04:54,320 --> 00:04:56,020
That mouth stinks.

98
00:04:57,220 --> 00:04:58,960
Oh, yeah.

99
00:05:00,640 --> 00:05:07,439
All right, people. I have just been
informed that your remaining classes are

100
00:05:07,440 --> 00:05:14,339
postponed until we locate the source of
the even more vile than usual order in

101
00:05:14,340 --> 00:05:15,199
this room.

102
00:05:15,200 --> 00:05:17,900
Everybody report to the cafeteria now.

103
00:05:24,150 --> 00:05:25,200
Cool. See?

104
00:05:25,430 --> 00:05:27,720
I told you this mouse would give me a
cool wish.

105
00:05:30,190 --> 00:05:34,430
I wish I had nachos.

106
00:05:34,670 --> 00:05:36,950
And I wish I could score.

107
00:05:38,370 --> 00:05:42,710
I wish I was scoring right now with 20
chips all at the same time.

108
00:05:44,050 --> 00:05:50,050
I wish you'd get rid of that smelly
bottle.

109
00:05:52,299 --> 00:05:54,400
Nothing's happening. This sucks.

110
00:05:55,040 --> 00:05:56,090
Yeah, really.

111
00:05:56,800 --> 00:05:58,680
It sucks and it stinks.

112
00:05:59,680 --> 00:06:02,420
Get rid of that bottle, Beavis, before I
smack you.

113
00:06:05,920 --> 00:06:07,480
Let's leave it in the cafeteria.

114
00:06:09,060 --> 00:06:10,110
Cool.

115
00:06:22,670 --> 00:06:23,720
Yeah, yeah, chicks!

116
00:06:24,230 --> 00:06:26,390
Yeah, yeah, here are some chicks, yeah!

117
00:06:26,810 --> 00:06:29,130
Uh, not so fast, Beavis.

118
00:06:29,490 --> 00:06:31,190
Hey, those aren't chicks.

119
00:06:31,191 --> 00:06:34,909
This is that beer commercial where those
four dudes come in and it's like

120
00:06:34,910 --> 00:06:37,500
ladies' night, and they're dressed up
like chicks.

121
00:06:38,230 --> 00:06:39,280
No way, really?

122
00:06:39,390 --> 00:06:40,440
Yeah.

123
00:06:40,910 --> 00:06:42,010
It's really dumb.

124
00:06:42,270 --> 00:06:43,970
No way about it. Um, really?

125
00:06:44,310 --> 00:06:45,360
Yeah.

126
00:06:45,790 --> 00:06:49,190
Boy, they have some pretty nice boobs
for a dude.

127
00:06:50,930 --> 00:06:51,980
Yeah, I guess so.

128
00:06:56,050 --> 00:07:01,430
Whoa, check it out. She's got a boner
switchblade.

129
00:07:01,650 --> 00:07:02,700
Oh, yeah, yeah.

130
00:07:03,670 --> 00:07:04,720
Cool.

131
00:07:05,910 --> 00:07:07,710
I'll save you, baby. I'll save you.

132
00:07:07,910 --> 00:07:09,170
As long as you do it with me.

133
00:07:09,171 --> 00:07:13,069
It's like one of those movies where
they're kicking ass in a restaurant, and

134
00:07:13,070 --> 00:07:16,749
guy comes out and says, your crab
style's very good, but it's not much for

135
00:07:16,750 --> 00:07:17,800
flying crane style.

136
00:07:21,080 --> 00:07:23,160
Yeah, except this is a beer commercial.

137
00:07:24,400 --> 00:07:31,100
I like when girls fight. They're like,

138
00:07:31,101 --> 00:07:34,259
yeah, she called me a bitch and I said,
you're a slut. Yeah, well, we'll go

139
00:07:34,260 --> 00:07:36,490
outside and we'll see who the slut is,
bitch.

140
00:07:37,280 --> 00:07:38,340
Settle down, diva.

141
00:07:38,620 --> 00:07:39,670
Yeah,

142
00:07:42,640 --> 00:07:45,980
you slut.

143
00:07:49,470 --> 00:07:50,520
Yeah, yeah, bitch.

144
00:07:51,050 --> 00:07:58,029
I should have done this

145
00:07:58,030 --> 00:07:59,470
at the beginning of the video.

146
00:07:59,590 --> 00:08:01,829
I was

147
00:08:01,830 --> 00:08:08,589
in the cafeteria, and I found this

148
00:08:08,590 --> 00:08:11,809
bottle with a dead mouse in it, so I
took it to the bottling plant, and they

149
00:08:11,810 --> 00:08:15,549
gave me 20 bucks not to tell anyone,
because it would be bad for business and

150
00:08:15,550 --> 00:08:16,910
stuff. Cool.

151
00:08:17,610 --> 00:08:20,370
Uh, That sounds kind of like the mouse
we found.

152
00:08:23,350 --> 00:08:24,400
Um, yeah.

153
00:08:26,030 --> 00:08:27,080
Oh,

154
00:08:27,590 --> 00:08:28,670
I smell another mouse.

155
00:08:29,090 --> 00:08:30,140
Hey, you.

156
00:08:31,330 --> 00:08:34,530
No creature is stirring.

157
00:08:34,809 --> 00:08:35,929
Not even a mouse.

158
00:08:38,070 --> 00:08:39,990
I just cut the cheese.

159
00:08:40,990 --> 00:08:42,040
Oh, yeah.

160
00:08:43,150 --> 00:08:45,440
Now that means you gotta, like, give us
a wish.

161
00:08:46,350 --> 00:08:47,400
Let's see.

162
00:08:49,301 --> 00:08:51,069
I got one.

163
00:08:51,070 --> 00:08:53,470
I wish you hadn't farted.

164
00:08:53,850 --> 00:08:54,900
Uh,

165
00:08:55,170 --> 00:09:01,830
what the hell is that?

166
00:09:02,090 --> 00:09:03,790
Yeah, what the hell was that?

167
00:09:08,770 --> 00:09:09,820
What?

168
00:09:09,930 --> 00:09:11,030
Yeah, what did he say?

169
00:09:12,301 --> 00:09:16,989
Hey, but I think I understood something
he said.

170
00:09:16,990 --> 00:09:18,350
I think he said river.

171
00:09:19,890 --> 00:09:21,110
Good ear, Beavis.

172
00:09:22,510 --> 00:09:25,220
Well, like, this song must be about,
like, this river.

173
00:09:26,430 --> 00:09:28,840
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, is that a
buffalo?

174
00:09:29,630 --> 00:09:32,750
Uh, I think it's a wolf.

175
00:09:33,910 --> 00:09:36,140
A buffalo could kick a wolf's ass,
butthead.

176
00:09:36,530 --> 00:09:37,580
Damn it, Beavis.

177
00:09:38,570 --> 00:09:39,690
Wolves eat buffalo.

178
00:09:41,270 --> 00:09:42,830
That's what they do for a living.

179
00:09:43,510 --> 00:09:45,430
I'm not gonna argue with you, butthead.

180
00:09:45,610 --> 00:09:48,020
Morrissey could probably kick a
buffalo's ass.

181
00:09:48,260 --> 00:09:49,310
Shut up, buddy.

182
00:09:49,600 --> 00:09:50,650
Buffalo roll.

183
00:09:55,460 --> 00:10:02,140
Well, I just heard another word.

184
00:10:02,200 --> 00:10:03,380
I think he said two.

185
00:10:04,040 --> 00:10:05,360
He said two, buddy.

186
00:10:05,640 --> 00:10:07,560
That's not a word. That's a number.

187
00:10:08,120 --> 00:10:09,720
Well, somebody heard it.

188
00:10:10,500 --> 00:10:12,060
Maybe there's like two buffalo.

189
00:10:12,620 --> 00:10:13,670
Yeah.

190
00:10:13,940 --> 00:10:15,500
Or maybe two wolves.

191
00:10:15,671 --> 00:10:17,559
Shut up, buddy.

192
00:10:17,560 --> 00:10:18,610
Yeah.

193
00:10:19,420 --> 00:10:22,440
Check it out, Beavis.

194
00:10:22,700 --> 00:10:23,980
There's a chick in a river.

195
00:10:24,880 --> 00:10:27,650
Oh, yeah, yeah. See? See? So that's why
I said river. See?

196
00:10:27,651 --> 00:10:28,819
See? The river.

197
00:10:28,820 --> 00:10:30,919
Because there's a chick on the river.
See?

198
00:10:30,920 --> 00:10:32,480
Yeah. I was right. Yeah.

199
00:10:33,000 --> 00:10:34,880
Uh, okay, Beavis.

200
00:10:34,930 --> 00:10:39,480
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